Jul 20, 2005

Laertes is scared of girls!!! Everyone pass the cooties, LET'S GETIM!

aka: How not to stage a scene from Hamlet in three rehearsals or less.

Tomorrow is the big day, kids! The graveyard scene from Hamlet - Ophelia's burial - dramatic confrontation between Laertes and Hamlet...

"I love her more!"
"No I do!"
"Screw you, assclown!"
"stupidhead"
"I know you are but what am I?"
"I know you are but what am I?"
"stop copying me!"
"stop copying me!"
"SHUT UP!"
"NO YOU SHUT UP!"
"I'm gonna kick your ass"
"yeah right"
"no really, meet me by the swings and bring your rapier, bitch!"
"ooh, I'm trembling. Broadsword too heavy for you? Pussy."



Oh, sorry yes I was saying, tomorrow is the big day! I've done my bit which was to create a ravishingly intense and frightening video/soundscape to set the tone for the scene (since the dramatic intro scenes will be missing). It is totally excellent if I do say so myself. The only problem is Laertes is sposed to carry Ophelia onto the stage, but he wants to use a blow-up doll. (Dude, fer realz? What you got one a those for?)

Hamlet will be played by a beautiful (no, really OMFG)young North African woman who seems to have some chops for this acting game. Trouble is, during the tussle that is supposed to happen in our scene, Laertes is a bit on the weak side. He can (with prompting) grab Hamlet's shoulders (manfully!) but that's it. I think he might be afraid of touching a bit of boobie. Actually I'm not sure. But since our entire group was ready to kick him out on his cootie fearing ass if he brought a blowup doll to school tomorrow, there's a bit of a standoff.

I'll update you all tomorrow on the doings. I know you can't wait!

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